Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Now, what kind of fuckery is THIS?

Tricky bitches... Look at this bogus response to my letter of love!!!

Dear Ms Oppings,

Thank you for your recent correspondence with positive comments about your local Safeway store.

We have noted your kind words regarding the preparation and the quality of the Safeway Enriched Hot Dog Buns that you purchased last summer. We are confident that we will be able to continue to deliver the high standards you have come to expect as a valued customer. We request that you provide us with the location of the store, so that we can forward your comments to our Store Manager and the associates. We enjoy knowing our efforts to make shopping pleasant and convenient are appreciated by our customers.

If you would like to discuss this further, please reply to this email or call our toll free number at 1-877-723-3929 and reference contact I.D. 13002658. One of our associates will be happy to assist you.

Thank you again for your compliment. We appreciate your business and look forward to seeing you soon. Thank you for shopping at Safeway.


Alicia Sanders
Customer Service Center

Mr. Sanders,
You are a disingenuous woman and you are to be regarded with suspicion! Sir, you obviously did NOT read my e-mail! Do you just have it scanned by a computer to pick up "positive" words and "negative" words?!?!? How about this: Lame! Revolting! I puked a little in my mouth! For Shame on Safeway Buns! Heinous! Mank-jank-skank-rank-gank! Revolting! Putrid! You're killin us all! Ma'am, those buns..... that's just not right.
Please, try AGAIN, Miss Saunders:

(again, with the original letter.)


Dawn said...

Apparently buns full of strange chemicals that stay fresh for a year is a good thing to Safeway? :0

Anonymous said...

fuckery, waht a great word.

Tea N. Crumpet said...

They must be like margarine-- if you put them out with food, bugs will go to the food and not the margarine or the Safeway buns. That is so gross.

Anonymous said...

Evidently Safeway Customer Service employees aren't hired on the basis of their recognition of sarcasm and irony.

tundratantrum said...

My pictures are there. I think your computer must be having a problem. You had me worried tho...not that long ago got hacked and that messed up my page for a while.

Guess hwat. It's supposed to be 70-75 degrees til saturday. I might die of heat stroke.

solsticedreamer said...

i have finally sat down and read through all of your posts~what a fantastic laugh!

those buns are scary!

raining sheep said...

I have to remember the 'fuckery' word. Totally awesome! Yeah, and I am avoiding any Safeway bread product. Good GRIEF! What do you think was in those buns? Maybe we need some of that might make us stop aging too ;) I am surprised they have not tried marketing their wonder-preservative to someone like LaMer cosmetics...except that LaMer would charge $300 for a tiny jar of it!!

Tammy said...

Oh my goodness! roflol!

Um. lol. I don't even know what to say.

.....Maybe the employee was public schooled instead of homeschooled and just didn't get it. ????

You crack me up! :)

Kristen said...

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!!! I just found your blog after a friend forwarded it to me in an email. I can't believe the letter they sent you! That's...that's...I don't even know what.

PS: Fuckery is my new favorite word.